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Avian Action Almost Spoiled My Sunday Morning
As an adult your opportunities to participate in sleepovers diminish slowly over time. I am not sure if it has something to do with an unwillingness to sleep anywhere other than your own bed or if...
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The Modern Chicken: A Theropod At Heart
Tyrannosaurus rex is more closely related to a chicken than it is to an alligator. Think about that the next time you’re at a farm and you see twenty potential man eaters pecking away at food scraps....
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They Can Put A Man On The Moon
Americans used to be able to complain about something by saying “they can put a man on the moon….” Well they can put a man on the moon but now they can’t even do that anymore.
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Air Conditioning Doesn’t Build Character
I have been carrying around a sweater with me all summer because this country has an egregious and unhealthy obsession with air conditioning. Air conditioning doesn’t build character or make you a...
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Some Anti-Vaxxer I Know Gave Birth To A Mutant
In a country where a television network previously called The Learning Channel can have a programming lineup filled with shows about about fat illiterate families that yell all the time and people who...
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Police Stopped Climate Change… Protesters From Protesting.
Over the weekend nearly half of a million people peacefully marched down Sixth Avenue through Midtown Manhattan hoping to make the correct amount of noise required to convince corrupt decision-makers...
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Smoking: Still Totally Cool
I used to love smoking. For years smoking allowed me to take longer and more frequent breaks at work, was a good excuse to get off my ass and go outside, and frequently allowed me an opportunity to...
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My New Mom Is A Computer
Like many of you, I was born of a human mother made of soft pink flesh and electric impulses wrapped up in skin and topped with hair. She was a kindly woman and my father loved her dearly for all three...
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Lame New World: A Preface For Our Awful Future
Not long ago I was filling out a number of worksheets intended for small children, as I have a propensity to do during an evening of moderate drinking, and they pressed me into wondering about the...
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